darlingwalker:

i want to achieve “she’s adorable and i will protect her at all costs but also i am slightly frightened by her power”

reblogged 1 day ago with 65,925 notes via / source

maybenotboring:

and at no point has anyone thought “maybe we should not build a giant flammable goat this year”

reblogged 1 day ago with 209,661 notes via / source

earthdad:

seeing guys be really rude to girls and telling them to go back to the kitchen

image

reblogged 1 day ago with 28,897 notes via / source

joshpeckofficial:

i’m not like most girls

reblogged 1 day ago with 49,359 notes via / source

annoyingbloqqer:

gay marriage isnt legal but these are

image

reblogged 1 day ago with 51,720 notes via / source
reblogged 2 days ago with 253,771 notes via / source

vernondaviscrying:

IM SCREAMING SO LOUD

reblogged 2 days ago with 54,200 notes via / source

nerdjpg:

when you get to school and realize you forgot to put on deodorant 

image

reblogged 2 days ago with 512,211 notes via / source

stains:

this is my sisters contacts

reblogged 2 days ago with 185,674 notes via / source

ocevns:

6-packs:

ocevns:

america is like the popular girl in school: everyone talks shit about her behind her back, but as soon as she talks to them, everyone pretends they love her because they know they’ll be cooler and get invited to parties

and then canada is like america’s best friend, who’s like the uglier version of her, but all the other kids think she’s way nicer

mexico is like the weird kid who keeps trying to get really close to america to smell her hair

reblogged 2 days ago with 14,490 notes via / source

vajupiter:

karcuttle:

me: *accidentally makes a noise that sounds like a fart*
me: *makes noise 500 more times so anyone who heard it knows i did not fart*

what if they think you farted 501 times

reblogged 2 days ago with 9,578 notes via / source

naotakunn:

i cant believe this. i cant fucking believe this. i meant to send this to my boyfriend but instead i sent it to my boss right after i told her i was quitting all i wanted to do was make an inappropriate cookie joke but no i got mixed up texting two people at once and literally sent a picture of a chocolate chip cookie captioned “ooh she thique” to the fifty year old suburban mother of two of whom i have nothing but a strictly professional relationship with. after knowing me for almost a year and a half as a hard working and respectable employee this is the last thing i will ever say to her i can never go back to that shop again all because of this god damn cookie blunder What have i Done

reblogged 2 days ago with 65,259 notes via / source
  • Period: You want cookies
  • Period: You want to fuck
  • Period: You want to fuck while eating cookies.
  • Period: Let's be sad about trivial things, shall we?
  • Period: Kill them.
  • Period: Kill them too.
  • Period: Kill them and eat their cookies.
  • Period: Shhhh it's okay you'll feel better soon.
  • Period: HAHAHAHAHA NO YOU WON'T FUCK YOU.
  • Period: Whoops you dropped a spoon better cry
reblogged 3 days ago with 492,797 notes via / source
reblogged 3 days ago with 24,245 notes via / source